The moral of the story of an epic baking fail…“if you want a loaf made properly… Knead it yourself!”

This tale begins on a very positive note of excitement and high expectations… Ms Airtrafficbaker acquired a bread-maker! Granted, it is a rather dated hand-me-down machine, but nonetheless I was informed that it produced a good loaf. I will also admit that I was feeling so optimistic of the prospect of a masterpiece of a loaf, that I took the decision to NAME the bread-maker Paul… as in Hollywood, Master Baker (FYI it is perfectly acceptable to name kitchen appliances and equipment; we dearly love Bill the teapot). Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a fan of a new kitchen gadget as much as the next home baker, but right now my opinion is certainly leaning towards the sound of “if you want a loaf made properly… Knead it yourself!”.

Now, I don’t lie when I say it has been a long time since I’ve had an epic baking fail such as this one, yet being somewhat of a perfectionist (often seems to cause me more stress than is good for me?!) the whole incident was certainly immensely frustrating and yes, I will even stretch to being a tad mellow-dramatic and say traumatic! In short, no loaf was produced, and the whole process was a string of disasters!

First of all, a complete school-girl error on my part… Making a big mistake in measuring out the required volume of tepid water for the dough. Yes I admit it, I was looking at the wrong side of the jug!… Using 1dl instead of 1 cup of liquid (oh the shame!). HOWEVER I would also like to take this opportunity to rant about how much I despise it when recipes state quantities in ‘cups’…FYI Morphy Richards 48260 BreadMaker user-manual, you drink out of a cup… You measure with scales, in GRAMS… or in MLs (As far as I’m concerned anyway :p). I digress.. anyway, so that was a bad start, only realising after ten minutes of bread machine action that the mistake had been made (although my bakers instinct was screaming that the mix was far too dry from the beginning), I swiftly poured in the rest of the required water. Now just to kill 2hours 50mins until (with a bit…lot…of luck) a perfect wholemeal loaf would appear in the a machine… OR NOT.

With approximately 1hour 10mins remaining on the timer… The flats power cut out, thanks to a tripped switch. I won’t repeat the mumblings which were muttered under my breath when I realised with more than a little frustration that the machine had reset itself, and the whole process was simply one big waste of time. That’s 2 hours of my life that I will NEVER get back thanks to you, Mr bread maker -.- Luckily, my darling fiancé was at hand to swiftly steer me out of the kitchen with a cup of tea and the assurance that he would dispose of the ‘mess’ (had he not been around, the bread maker may have met a sorry end… Possibly flying out over the terrace and into the canal. I assure you I don’t usually have anger management issues-promise!).

So there you have it, one account of an epic baking fail. My relationship with my bread maker is still on shaky grounds. But today is a new day… And (foolishly?!) I ato planning on going in for attempt 2 at producing a beutiful loaf. My thinking (until proven other wise) though, is very much sticking with the traditional method of hand-making bread is certainly best (even if it does require e considerably more elbow grease!)

If anyone else has recently had a baking disaster (particularly involving a bread maker) do leave a comment and share your misery. Or perhaps your disaster turned into a resounding success??… perhaps a delicious mess was the outcome? Either way, don’t be shy! 🙂

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